[Original inspiration]

Could the following things be connected!?

Bea Arthur’s death
PTSD-inducing low-flying jumbo jets in Manhattan
Swine flu outbreak

My Catholic upbringing has always taught me that bad things come in threes.
I suspect this as the common link.

So much better than FML.  Funnier, and less likely to be fake.  I highly recommend that you put it in your eyes immediately.  
Every single entry puts the  ”Omg. So sorry i vomited on your head” I recieved on Monday to shame.
texts from last night

THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION.
Based on preliminary polling last night when my dance skills weren’t getting my friends cut off at the bar and when I wasn’t being threatened with murder for amicably calling someone a quaid, this seems to be the most even matchup of any two people ever.
Who would you rather?/Who would you [...]

Alternative title: Carrie Prejean makes me realize I’m completely crazy and probably a hypocrite.
This Miss California has been all up everywhere in my eyes and ears in the past two days.  Here’s twenty words about what happened if you haven’t heard: In the Miss USA pageant, Miss California was asked about gay marriage by judge [...]

Marathon watching is officially and literally my new favorite spectator sport. I screamed my face off for like 3 hours while drinking beer outside and caused parents to relocate their children far from me.  BUT!  I did persuade at least 15 people that were walking like wusses to man the eff up and start running [...]

Consider my shoulders brushed off.
Not to give it away right off the bat, but Lisa Cooke, aka my new best friend, has named the sexy protagonist of her debut novel after my blog.
Here’s the delightful official description:
As if losing the war to the Yankees weren’t bad enough, Lottie Mason must get  $15,000 dollars to protect [...]