Dear reader,

Please reconsider all previous criticisms and skepticism of people who find images of God in toast and Cheetos, because today, I found God in my facebook newsfeed. If I can use “God” as a placeholder for “extreme coincidence”.  Poetic license, people.

I hope you have read this post, a.k.a. my last post, a.k.a. the post in which I chronicled an evening in which an older couple engaged in some impromptu manual exercises in the middle of a crowded bar, a.k.a. handjobs.  This post is a sequel to that post.

You may remember that Naughty Nelly told me that she and Robert met at a gay bar, “well not so much a gay bar. It’s more of a whorehouse.”  TURNS OUT! Nelly may not have been as a reliable source as I originally may have intuited!  I have a friend who is a talented photographer (check him out) who just so happened to be on assignment for a photography project.  The place in which he was on assignment was Jacque’s, which is a drag bar in Boston.  That is where Robert and Nelly met, because they were spotted together! Not a whorehouse at all!  I feel so betrayed.  Photographer friend sent me this shot:

This is Robert and Nelly dancing together at the drag bar almost exactly one hour before I encountered them. The song being performed at this time was “I Will Survive”. Unfortunately, the performer on stage at this time was the only one that did not agree to be photographed by my friend, so I can’t provide any more detail or context about their now-fabled meeting. (Video, for possible illustrative purposes only). For the record, Jacque’s has the following policy listed on the homepage of their website:

We sincerely ask that you please remain seated throughout the performance for the enjoyment of all our customers and out of respect for the entertainers who work so hard for you. Thank you.

Speaking with my friend, we have been able to forensically synthesize an accurate timeline of their evening based on timestamps of photos and text messages.

• 11:45 pm – This picture is taken. 
• 12:04 am – Robert and Nelly leave Jacque’s drag bar and do the nasty on the patio of an unknown restaurant. Please do not share photographic evidence supporting that second part if anyone happens to have any, I’ve had enough coincidences about this thank you very much.
• 12:57 am – They’re in the bar I’m in, doing yuck yuck things I’ve previously mentioned.
• 1:10 am- They retire to Robert’s hotel room.
• 1:54 am  – Nelly comes back to the bar, she and I chat.
• 2:01 am – Robert comes to collect Nelly, the bar closes, I go home and have nightmares for the rest of the week.

So like, there’s nothing exceedingly exciting or newsworthy, other than the extreme coincidence that I was not the only person I know to encounter Nelly and Robert that fateful evening.  Although I think I’m pretty much done with my recent luck of coincidentally finding people having sex in public for trues, people.